I used to be afraid of anything demonic or devilish in my walk as a Christian. If there was ever a time someone started to talk about the devils' work, witchcraft, evil spirits, etc, I would run the other way in fear, avoiding the conversation, bound by my ignorance. I spent most of my life this way, oblivious to the call from God for me to suit up in battle for the spiritual warfare of my life (See Ephesians 6). And God granted me my request to avoid it for a long time. War Room, the movie, gave me a little push. That scene of Priscilla Shirer yelling at the devil to get out of her house and commanding God to shift her husband's mind did something to my heart. It reminded me that I had the power of God within me (Luke 10:19). But I wasn't all the way there. I still was very surface. Oohhh look at my cute war closet with my scriptures and my bible and my candles, post a picture on Facebook. I will be honest, I didn't just post pictures I actually used my prayer closet. Often. Life started to present challenges I wasn't used to. I would say I had a pretty easy life until I started to push back against the enemy's agenda and stepped out of my comfort zone.
1 Corinthians 13:11 says
When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.
In Hebrew, child is translated "nepios" meaning an infant, little child, a minor, not of age, childish, untaught, or unskilled. This was definitely me. I had been going to church all of my life, like literally and I very rarely heard any preacher I listened to talk about spiritual warfare. Most of the sermons I had heard involved the joy, grace and mercy of God. Talks of building up God's kingdom and being a "good" Christian. I am not saying there is anything wrong with that but what I AM saying is it can be extremely misleading. I think what I thought was if I did "good" enough God would reward me with the desires of my heart and I had to just keep maintaining that and I wouldn't have to deal with the devil. Sheesh. What a childish mindset right. This also spoke to my lack of understanding of the Bible. Because I was reading the Bible but I wasn't READING and gaining wisdom, knowledge and understanding. I was going to church every Sunday and Wednesday and letting that take me throughout my week. I thought if I praised and worshipped and changed my life enough, God will reward my deeds. But attacks kept coming and getting stronger and stronger and I felt weaker and weaker and I knew something wasn't right.
It wasn't until 2020 during the pandemic when God stripped me of all of my comfort zones and sat me in a house with my husband and my son and nothing else but Him and us that I began to realize I was walking with God so poorly and so immaturely. I was wildly immature. I had made so many poor missteps in my walk with Christ, being blatantly disrespectful, coming into agreement with covenants of the devil, worshipping idols of my life, which led to me committing adultery against God, unwillingly blaspheming Him and breaking His commandments. And overall I opened myself and my family up to things that I am combatting and renouncing to this day. Anyone looking at me from the outside would have thought I had it all together. Shoot, I thought I had it all together.
So I had to change, a second rededication to God and the first on my list? REPENTANCE. In Hebrew 'repent' means to turn back, return, to bring back, restore, refresh, turn toward and turn against. In Greek it means to change one's mind for better, to amend with abhorrence of one's past sins and think differently.
Mark chapter 1 describes repentance as Jesus' first topic when He began His public ministry.
Now after John was put in prison, Jesus came to Galilee, preaching the gospel of the kingdom of God, and saying, "the time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God is at hand. Repent, and believe in the gospel."
I feel it is safe to say based on Jesus' words repentance is pretty darn important. To honestly and openly admit you made mistakes. And I honestly had made so many. From being a people pleaser, which is a form of idolatry, to an abortion I had in my twenties, to serving man and not God, attempting to do things at church for the grace and mercy of human beings. I even had to repent for making my marriage and parenting an idol, for ignoring God's call to me to be in ministry and instead seeking to make profit by creating a business God didn't tell me to create. There are so many things and all of it was SPIRITUAL WARFARE. Suggestions by the devils minions, and me ignoring God's miracles, signs and wonders clouded by the attempts of the enemy to use my fear against me and keep me from going deeper with God. And truly? Religion had me in a chokehold. I was so worried about doing "right' and "good" by God I simply needed to prioritize my relationship with Him through His Holy word. I was looking for God in all the wrong places, literally ignoring the Holy Sprit and being driving by my own personal will.
Friends, hear me out okay. We open up doors of demonic activity when we come out of agreement with the Holy Spirit. We MUST repent and seek first the kingdom (Matthew 6:33). The guidelines of the kingdom are in the word of God. You won't find God anywhere else but in His word. Will He supplement, OF COURSE. But there is only ONE SOURCE. My hope, my prayer is my testimony of ignorance will encourage you. The only fear we need to rely on is reverence to our God of all gods and Lord of all lords. To "reverence" in Hebrew means to fear, revere or respect, be afraid, to stand in awe of or to cause astonishment and awe. To reverence our King is to acknowledge His sovereignty and lordship over our lives and renounce any agreement with anything the devil sends our way. I will be honest, its a journey, and not an easy journey either. But when I was choosing to come in agreement with the easy way, it was a contract with the devil for the easy life. Nothing about our walk with our Lord and Savior will be easy. But when we submit to Him, all our cares are submitted to Him and His glory is revealed and His light so shine and oh my there is no greater glory than our God our king.
Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.
Matthew 11:28-30 NKJV
Let's grow up friends and rest in the bosom of our Holy King! Glory to God!
Brethren, do not be children in understanding; however, in malice be babes, but in understanding be mature.
1 Corinthians 14:20
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